I'm not the person who brought the student into her home, and she didn't respond when asked the outcome before, Heidi. However, when I was President of a school we had a policy against fraternization with students. The thinking is that familiarity can breed contempt but it also puts the staff member at risk for unfound charges. Under some circumstances such behavior could lead to dismissal.
As indicated in the coursework, there is indeed a fine line. I believe a clear distinction and focus on taking interest in the resolution of the student's problem rather than the emotional ties in the ownership of the problem is the key. Getting involved to an emotional degree clouds the ability to be objective and often times directly honest.
To be effective, support people must remain objective and avoid any emotional investment in the problem. The problem is the student's. Taking ownership only perpetuates the problem and eliminates an opportunity to learn self sufficiency. What techniques to you use to maintain objectivity, Robert?
I totally agree with you Stephanie. I care for my students very much too. I am not sure what is considered to much...maybe that is somethings to discuss with your boss.
Does your campus allow you to bring students into your home?
As I answered before, my school had a strict no fraternization policy that would prohibit bringing students into your home.
What is your school's policy? What alternatives would you use, Michael?
Yes, you must keep it professional and within school guide lines. You must do for all what you do for one. Wanting to go above and beyond is normal but not always benificial for the student.
Your points are well made. One of the key defining attributes of successful faculty and staff is how they define and manage that fine line with students. Some seem to have a natural ability to navigate difficult situations and consistently come out with a 'happy ending'. If only we could figure out that formula.
I feel getting to involved with the students makes the students feel you are their friend instead of their instructor
How do you draw the line, Brenda?
How do you draw the line, Brenda?
I think that there is a point when you cross the line from mentoring to friend. for example if you learn too much information about one student then the other students may think you might treat that person better than you treat them.
Remember students talk inbetween classes sometimes their thoughts or ideas of how one gets treated in class gets skewed when conversation is passed from student to student.
tklingsick
I had and excellent student who stopped attending for no apparent reason. I found out that he was living at a hotel intoxicated and was suffering from alcohol poisoning. I attempted to get him back and to get counselling for his addiction. However, it was in vain... So I had several students assist me the second time. Upon arrival to the hotel they called 911 and had him hospitalized. Subsequently, he was admitted to rehab and is now back in class leading the class by example. He will be one of the best graduates we will ever have.
Thank you for sharing this experience, Frank. Unfortunately, too many people would simply have written off such a person. You and your students certainly have changed this person's life. And thank you for caring so deeply about your students.
