I find that angry students are not the deep breathers. I take the deep breaths myself. I agree that listening helps diffuse the anger. I may ask the student to sit down with me (so we are both at the same level) and write down "what happened." I find that our perceptions are often like the Rabbit-Duck illusion. We work from there. Angry students have told me they appreciate my hearing out their side of the story.
Taking the angry student to another location helps to keep the other students from buying into the frustrated student's opinions and resentments. Sometimes the discussion may involve more than one student, however, and may have to be addressed with the class.
December 21, 2011
What has worked for me is making time for the student as quickly as possible. Once that time has been set aside, I allow the student to vent in the manner that is comfortable for them. Of course, no violence, but at times, a student may only be accustomed to speaking in a tone or tongue that they have always been accustomed to.
With that, there may be cursing and their voice may be raised. I just ask them at that point to try to calm and collect themselves as I truly want to hear their concerns. If they are unable, I tell them that in all fairness to me and for me to remain objective, they need to return later to discuss the issue with me when they've calmed down.
Once all is manageable and tolerable, I repeat their concern as I've interpreted it for clarity. I remain calm and attempt to make sure that I do not repeat what their complaint is with any inflection in my voice that sounds judgmental or indignant.
When they feel that I understand their complaint, I ask them what I can do to make the situation better for them. Usually, they spout off an unreasonable expectation because it is instant gratification to get that off of their chest. Once I repeat that to them and ask them if that truly is what they desire or if it seems even rational to them, they hear their own words and realize that it is certainly not a reasonable expectation.
In the majority of these situations, most of the students just need 'a shoulder' or 'an ear' or, they are just looking for someone to 'fix' their dilemma.
At that point, I help them approach it with a way they can envision making the situation more tolerable for themselves.
JFO
When I have an angry student, during break or after class, I ask to speak with the student to see what is going on. More often than not, it is something outside of class that they have brought with them.
However, if they are disruptive in class, I will have the class go on break so I can talk with the student to find out what is going on. Of course, I wouldn't send them on break if the angry student in not disruptive in class. I will then approach them on our regularly scheduled break or after class.
Regardless, I do not call them out during class or try to engage them in class discussion. I have found that by doing this will make the student more angry or become very disruptive in class, which is counterproductive.
If I notice that the student walks into class angry, I will usually ask them at the beginning of class to find out what is going on--only by kneeling down beside them to find out what is going on. This will also usually diffuse the student from whatever they brought with them.
When you see teachers get their backs up, you know their response will need to be fixed. I see this more with teachers who are insecure and feel they must have all the answers.
Listening before reminding the student of the appropriate behavior really makes the instructor look as a better example for the student.
Hi Brenda,
I like how you tactfully and carefully handle the angry student. You use a very calming demeanor.
Patricia Scales
Listen, and instead of stoopng to their level, let them know that you care about whatever it is bothering them.
I ask the student to step out of the class. I try not engage an angry students alone. I find that students tend to change their story when they are brought into the director's office.
I also like the idea of having the students write their complaints down. I can see how that can be very effective.
Hi Patricia,
Thank you very much. I have learned to meet the student where they are at versus reacting to their mood or comments. Plus, it demonstrates to the other students how situations will be handled should they occur again in the class.
:) Brenda
Hi Michelle,
Listening is key, and never make an angry student angrier.
Patricia Scales
Hi Brenda,
It is best to use an extremely calm demeanor with angry students.
Patricia Scales
I must admit that I very much like the suggestion of having the angry student formulate their anger on paper. I had a scenario last year where I wish I would have applied that strategy then. While things remained controlled, it would probably have been extinguished by the student herself if she had written it down. This is a very effective way to deal with AND document the incident. I'm sure that there are many professions out there where a student feels he/she is treated unfairly, especially during an externship phase. This method will allow all parties involved to think about the incident, and act on it.
Really, I wish I had done this sooner...
First, I attempt to assess the magnitude / level of anger (is my life/wellbeing or others in jeopardy?).
Secondly, I LISTEN to the rant and carefully try to extrapolate the cause and concern of this persons anger (root).
Thirdly, I ASK "How can I help you?" or "What can I do to help?"
After some 23 years at this, I seldom have these difficulties.
I don't get a lot of angry students. I thought it was interesting, though,
that the course noted that angry students are typically male. Perhaps our school is an anomaly; however, I've noted the complete opposite. Typically our angry students are exclusively female. It's rare that I encounter an angry male student. Perhaps it's just the type students who are drawn to the program in which I teach.
Male or female, often times the student needs time to calm down. Sometimes anything you do will rachet up the situation. I've already sent angry students out of class to take a walk. I stress that I'm not assigning blame, just giving them an opportunity to leave the situation temporarily.
I've also asked students to put their frustrations in writing. This can both help clarify the source of their anger and diffuse the situation.
By listening keenly it helps to diffuse the student. Being reactive only fuel the anger. Paraphrasing help the student to articulate the problem and provide the student with a sense of being heard. It is important to understand that the genesis for anger is often rooted in the need to express the reason for the emotion in the first place. Once there is a clear understanding of the reason for the anger then you must work diligently and honestly toward a solution.
Asking the student to step outside is a good tactic in working with an angry individual. By removing him or her from the class, this allows the instructor to address the situation. A student may feel as if they have to defend him or her self infront of their peers. This offers a neutral environment to discuss the problem.
I try to get them outside the classroom where they can state the issue and I listen. I have found that some students are frustrated because no one will listen to the problems they are having at home. Sometimes it is because the class is too much for them and they are having trouble keeping up with note taking. But I try to find ou twhy they are mad and do what I can to help. If I can't then I try to find someone who can help.
If a student is displaying inappropriate behavior I call attention to it immediately. If necessary, ask the student to step out of the classroom to talk, or ask the student to leave. I am always aware of my surroundings and where security is located.
As many others have said here, stop and listen. I work in a career school and once, just by listening, I was able to alert my school to a problem with one of its programs that it was completely unaware of. My students were so angry that I devoted the entire first hour (of four) to resolving or at least attempting to resolve their complaint. Even though the dispute had nothing to do with my department, my students were much more respectful towards me as a result.
I had some anger students last quarter and I did allow them to air their grievances. For the most part this was helpful and all of these students became more involved with the class.
Listening, and ask how I can help then if needed go to a manager.
