Student /Teacher relationship
Your student like you, and are ocassionalyy inviting you out to drink with them. As a proffesional you don't accept in order to maintaine the student/trainer relationship. You group graduates and you are no longer there trainer. They invite you again, arguing, there is no longer a conflict. What would you do know?
Andrés
Hi Andres,
Your question of what would you do in terms of attending a social event with your graduates is a most appropriate one. I believe the best answer is how comfortable you feel in attending such an event. By comfortable I mean in that social setting. Do you intend to spend the entire evening with them, or just drop by a say "Hi" and then leave, etc.
I maintain the rule that I will attend certain major events in their lives, graduation parties, weddings, etc. I do not go out drinking with them. In reality they are at a different career point than I am and I want to welcome them to the profession and I can show respect by attending the major events. In addition, I simply do not have the time, as I want to be home with my family as much as is possible.
Gary
Hi andres,
I have been in this situation before and unless its something important in the students life and you want to support them say no.
I have a very good relationship with my students and I'm not much older than them which makes it hard for them to see a model more than a friend. But at the end there's is nothing better than clear and straight communication with your students.
Hi Andres,
Well said. Professionalism is critical in all situations. By always acting professional you will not go wrong and you will develop the respect of your students.
Gary
Hi Andres,
Having taught for a number of years this topic has always come up after graduation. I've always felt it best to maintain a professional relationship even after their graduation. As a result there will be fewer opportunities for uncomfortable issues to arise.
The only time I've ever developed a personal relationship is when I've had former students later in life work at the same organization. Then over time it becomes more of a peer type relationship. It took some getting used to at first.
Troy
I would not feel comfortable going out drinking with them whether they are my current students or ex-students. I would not have a problem going out to dinner, but I know that I would not be able to go have drinks with them personally.
Hi Karl,
The key point is to always, always conduct yourself as a professional and never never put yourself in a position where you can damage your reputation. It is never worth the cost.
Gary
I understand that you must maintain a professional relationship with your students. But is it truly wrong to have one or two drinks with your students if you are celebrating an event with them as long as you maintain an understanding with your students that you are still their teacher?
Jordan
In my opinion as a Department Chair this is one of the most serious breaches of student teacher relationships! To be effective in the classroom the relationship must remain, as the legal profession calls it, "at arms length". You do not gain the credibility of your class by trying to enter their social / peer group through such activity.
